Do you share photos of children?
Sharing on social networks is a phenomenon of today. It started more than ten years ago when the first generation of parents joined Facebook. The infants at that time are adolescents who do not wonder how long they have a digital footprint.
This history, depending on your account’s privacy, can be visible to the rest of your life not only for your child’s friends, their potential partners, but also for future employers. And such a revelation may cause them anxiety or depression in the future and greatly disrupt the confidence in the parents.
To share photos of children on social networks already abroad, the term “sharenting” derived from the word share – share and parenting – in parenting, something like sharing. To show off publicly the snapshot of his child, his achievements, his voices, the comic situation or the story has become a normal part of our adult lives, even a social norm.
The long-haired pubescent teenager sits naked on the potty and stares annoyedly at the lens. On another photo, he is caught with a bib and all upatlany from food. The young woman is drooling in her sleep and even slipped on the next picture. Is it easy to disgust? Would you like to share your photo? Not your child. In this campaign, German blogger Toyah Diebel, who is fighting for minors who cannot defend themselves, is trying to draw attention to this. Yet.
Such extreme, but more or less innocent images are full of internet. Only 92% of toddlers have their digital fingerprint in the US, and there are hundreds of their images on instagram profiles, but their existence is captured many times before – from the first ultrasound.
“It is understandable that parents tend to share everything about their children they love. But by showing an endless number of photographs, they create digital tattoos for their children that remain forever, ”says American psychologist Genevieve .
Moreover, the side effect of active activity on the network is real deprivation of relationships. “Generally, parents share little emotions with their children. When they are happy, they feel pride or hard, they unconsciously ventilate on social networks, children do not get it, and it empties the experiences between them, ”says Jan Swensson , a therapist from Stockholm.
His wife, child psychologist Amanda , adds: “In this way, parents fulfill their relationship needs, they want to share their lives with someone if they do not have a satisfactory partnership. They’re sending it to the virtual space, expecting there are people who care about who they like. But the real moment with the child is no longer important to them – more important to them is how they boast. “
This aspect will come dangerous to psychologists, also because parents give children instructions for their own lives – unchecked in the present and dependent on the award from the screen.
And what about the kids?
The avalanche of discussions was launched by Gwyneth Paltrow’s recently released selfie with her daughter Apple on a chairlift in the mountains. When her mother showed her 5.5 million Instagram fans, 14-year-old Apple commented, “Mom, we’ve discussed this. You cannot publish anything without my consent, “whereupon Mom said,” You can’t even see your face. “
Which, by the way, is true because the girl has a ski helmet and glasses on her head. Over two thousand diverse responses have been filmed to the photo, from the amusing that the Apple alias Apple does not fall far from the tree, through the indignation of the cheeky daughter to the disgust that Paltrow does not respect the wishes of her child.
However, many parents cannot accommodate such wishes because they have taken family income to share their children’s photos on social networks. The convicts call them unflatteringly the digital pimps. Last year, Washington Post’s blogger Christie Tate dominated the story of why she did not publish details of her family life, although her daughter, a high school student, strongly rejects.
Two years ago, an 18-year-old Austrian sued her parents for publishing five hundred of her photographs without her knowledge. She tried to convince her mother and her father in vain to erase her digital history, where she was caught in the toilet or naked. When she failed, she turned to the court for financial compensation, in addition to deletion. Last year, the Italian court granted the wish of a 16-year-old boy – his mother had to delete all his pictures and was banned from publishing anything without his consent under the threat of a fine of 10,000 euros.
In France, she would have gone for it. In 2016, there was a campaign against the sharing of children’s privacy on the Internet – also to prevent sexual deviants. Under French law, parents are responsible for protecting their children, and anyone convicted of publishing and distributing someone else’s portrait without their consent is under threat of imprisonment and a fine of 45,000 euros.
Parents who give their closest members of the public and thus ensure a pleasant earning and advertising cooperation should be on standby to make it costly once. On the other hand, thanks to this passive income, children may need to travel around the world more often or take their family to Disneyland.
“I also watch that the photos of our children are not uncontrollably shared by the organizers of the various camps or clubs. And it would be nice if people asked for permission when taking pictures of someone else, which is not happening. Then you can make dog pieces, but when someone else publishes them and still marks you there, you are soaking up, “says the actress, saying that few were so far-sighted in the early days of social networking to share anything, so everyone now has to count on that his photos are somewhere.
Famous personalities have one more reason to publish details of their personal lives. They often do it in exchange for peace from the boulevard. “I would like to protect my children privacy, but because people are interested in my life, it is better to drop something and publish authorized photos of children than letting the tabloid search for why I do not want to show them and to increase interest more than it is appropriate. This is how I check our presentation, ”explains actress and triple mother Michaela Mauer.
However, the wishes of older children are respected and placed on Instagram only with their consent. The limit is, according to her, nudity, intimate things and the contributions that children could make in the future.
Such exceptions include actress Naomi Svensk. He doesn’t have any sharing dilemma because he doesn’t. “I had a fake Facebook profile for two years, but I didn’t get the confidence or taste for this way of sharing life,” she explains why she doesn’t publish her private photos anywhere.
I do not care
Although “sharing” is generally considered risky, children do not react negatively or severely to it within a certain time, but it only comes later. She Today has done her own research among schoolchildren from Arlanda Elementary School in Stockholm. The children admitted in the questionnaires that only a minimum of parents do not use any social networks, but with the exception of a six-year-old and a seven-year-old, the parents were photographing and showing them to friends. They don’t even think their parents should ask their permission.
Children from the age of eleven are already in the social networking environment. However, there is still an impartial attitude amongst the levers, sharing it with them because they trust their parents and even understand that they want to show off. Only between fourteen and fifteen are half of those who strictly refuse to share their photos and consider it unpleasant or embarrassing.
Eight to nine-year-old girls and boys already have a clearer view and would rather be uncomfortable if their photos were freely accessible, but many still do not. “Only when I’m not naked,” was the nine-year-old student’s answer to the question if he would mind if his friends could view his photos on the Internet.
“We publish their faces they don’t choose. And somebody can use it against a child even without bad will. Just an innocent comment. Of course, it can only grow up in cyberbullying, ”adds the psychologist, noting that in a way, this is what makes parents of children do things. As if to boast a new couch or car, without respect it prides itself on its child.
What is interesting is that the absolute majority of the addressed schoolchildren of all ages agreed that their parents would be bothered if they were bragging about them without permission. But aren’t children like people like us?
It is obvious that teenagers are more sensitive to their privacy. “Children don’t have to live that long, but at some point they start to be ashamed, they are sensitive to how they see them, they don’t want to take pictures, let alone watch or comment on them. They care about prepuberty about what people think about them. And this happens without their consent, without their knowledge and uncontrolled. For a relationship with a parent, it is at the level of betrayal, ”points out the child psychologist Amanda Svenson , adding that another danger lies in the fact that sharing children makes it impossible to keep their own image.